I'm gonna write this in poem format. Screw organization and a 'narrow and manageable' subject. It's just easier to write a ridiculously long 'freeverse' sometimes... as you may have noticed I've done... several times before.
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I don't know how or why
But maybe I do
The lady who threatened suicide
Because her son was an atheist
She was terrible,
Teaching him to sin already!
Saying things no better than her poor son.
Love and nurturing him back
The prodigal
That was what she needed to do
But now I understand
Why she said what she said
Why she thought what she thought.
Lord, Lord forgive me
For ever thinking that way.
You put me here to love and show people your light.
Not fall into the darkness.
The darkness is all around me.
It is just too much.
Last night, it almost seemed worthless.
How could I fight all of this?
How would I last?
When no one truly believes...
Lost faith in people, slowly losing faith...
In You.
I never want to do that.
I never want to be so selfish.
Thinking of my family and friends,
They need me.
No, they need YOU. But,
You might be using me
To bring them to you.
God, forgive me.
If the country falls apart, bless us please.
If I screw up, please forgive me.
If they screw up, may they see Your light and confess.
Despicable thoughts that entered my mind.
Lord, forgive me for them.
Only once had they come before.
And it was only because I thought I was hated.
And none of that was true.
God, You surround me with so much love.
Forgive me for being so selfish.
Forgive me for thinking of murdering this piece of Your creatiion.
It was I, I would hurt, and yet, the others would grieve.
And I would be lost, forever.
And I never want that. Lord, please, please forgive me.
Never.
Lord, I value you. You love me. Lord, I love you.
I love the people you put me with.
I love even the sinners.
I try to discern.
I want to be Yours.
And I want them to be Yours.
Your unfailing love, Your love, Your kindness, compassion.
Your mercy, Your grace.
I need it, they need it.
Lord, You forgive. You are amazing.
To think that the Creator of the earth, the stars, the world, everything
Would take time to listen to me.
Lord, You only let me fall to my knees.
And I praise You. For loving me, even in the worst thought of sin.
Lord, I know You forgive me.
Lord, I trust You.
I know Your will is so much bigger than mine.
The plans for my life, You held, even before my birth.
You will not forsake me.
Forgive me for ever forsaking you.
Lord, I truly give You my life.
I will do as You command me.
Because You are God, You are awesome.
Thank You, Lord.
For saving me.
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8 comments:
That poem was amazing. And I know you can make it through this, Aly, you're so strong.
Aw, thanks, Leah-chan. *hug* *sniff* I'm better now. God is amazing. :) And the country will fall apart in about... *estimateofyearshere* Love you guys. :)
wow. I feel bad because i'm athesist and not really that religious because i'm forced 24/7 to learn about buddah... (parents). and that i can never ever ever ever write like that. like how do this stuff come to u?? not that anything doesn't come to me easily (like songs ect)... but anyways... i know this is really random... (out of the blue)... are you a twlight fan??? if you are high-fives and if you're gonna chastise me for being oblivious... i don't really notice the obvious. back to the point here: GREAT POEM!!
Thanks for commentin, dee name ez vlo! :) I'm sorry about your situation with your parents. Some things just...come to me. God inspires it for me sometime, sometimes it's just my thoughts, and I need to get them down. A lot of the time, it's easier to put things down in a poem, rather than a journal-type format. I think, it's different for everyone, writing. Write what you feel, write how you feel, why, what it makes it that way. Especially when those things happen, right when you get that feeling. Sometimes it can be dark, or happy, or strange, or just whatever. Anything can inspire a person to write.
Also, yes, I am a Twilight fan. 8) ^^ It's good to see another one of them out here. <333 Twilight. ^^
Thanks so much for your compliment! :) I'll have to check out YOUR blog sometime, if you have one. :) ^^ Love seeing new readers and all. You are all really great here, at blogspot. :)
~Aly
hmm... where can i start? scroll down my page until you see the "crank the volume" on the left hand side. then you click "Create Free" which is right below the music box. then it leads you to a link that says "http://www.myflashfetish.com/" you go there and click sign up... the sign up thing is way up on top you'll see it right next to log in. you then fill in all the blanks... and stuff.. after that just click what type of player you want and find music. then if after creating a playlist you click for the html code, copy it, and then go to your blog. Then you click customize which leads you to add and arrange elements. you click add an elemental, scroll down and there should be html/javascript. click that. you then paste your code. and save the element. there you're done!! enjoy your music box!!
^^ Ooh, thanks, DNEV! I hope you don't mind me calling you that... heh. ^^ :) I'll have to try and do that soon. :3
OHHHH MY YOU UPDATED!!! Why didn't you tell me? **jk**
O: I'm sorry, Dibs! O: It's oklayz. *hug* ^^ So, wassup?
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