Well, you should all be thankful I'm not listening to Blue October. That would have some negative affects here...
Contemporary Christian (of all sorts; rock, that typical pop-ish stuff, or poppy worship songs.... ) really does do wonders. If I would pay attention to the lyrics.
I don't think I'm doing what God would want me to right now... am I guilting Jared, or... just making him angrier? Probably one... or both... or the other. I'm just... I was being honest. I do regret this. I regret it so much. I regret my cheesy email, I regret telling him that I was beating myself about this... but am I really? Or am I just one of those 'effing lies' in his stat message?
I don't even know anymore.
I had stupid reasons, stupid, stupid, stupid freaking reasons that just... *sigh*
Maybe he's calming down now... I hope so. At least a little bit. I can tell that he doesn't hate me... he's just... angry...
And now he's calmer. Thank goodness...
But... I'm still guilty, but, shamefully, I admit, I'm relieved. That he's calmed down. Even if I sort of deserved this... no, I did deserve it. Or... oh, whatever.
*sigh*
I really hope things get better... if not this summer, at least some time. I'll pray for him... and everyone else, still.
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3 comments:
"I feel for you..." (quote from first comment i gave you, i tihnk)
Although I haven't fully expoerienced this sort of thing before, I can understand.
I understand you still want to be friends with Jared. And I'm sure that God isn't all that angry. You listened to yourself, and as you said, he's calming down...
Anyways, hope to see you soon...
(btw, I'm goign to camp this Wednesday (tomorrow) so I won't be commenting on you for a while...)
C-YOU IN ABOUT A WEEK, OR SO!
Sorry I haven't been on lately... see you after camp. And, thank you. I don't think He's angry. Jared was definitely angry, however. I know what I did was probably not wrong... but I can't help but feel pretty guilty about it. I accept your understanding. *hugzagain*
:)
-"Kim"
Your welcome. Just...your welcome.
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