I know ya'll pro'lly wanna hear abou the wedding, but... (vent/rantpost.o.e confuzzlingpost)

For starters, the wedding was great. There was an after party for the after party of the after party. All three parties and the wedding were cool. And my cousins pwn you.





Anyway, now to my dumb stupid emotions no one really wants to hear about... okay, maybe I'm wrong...





*hugs* I love you guys. *sigh*





School started today. I missed most of the day, due to my flight coming in.





But everyone seemed pretty nice. And it seems like I didn't screw up my friendship with Jared as much as I thought I had...








Okay, and NOW, to stop avoiding talking.





(Hm, I wonder where my guidance counselor's office is now... the school's office is all like, rearranged... o.e )








Okay.





Combination of sixth grade... and... well, you know what, no. It's all outside school. Everyone's got problems already.





-----------------


I was interrupted. By my parents. Talking about a lovely new routine. *sigh* Why couldn't I just let myself be inspired by them and their academic excellence, even though their families were... erm... (put nicely), different than my own.

*sigh*


In so many ways, I'm selfish and self-centered, and vain, and cold. And I create my own problems. And maybe, somewhere deep in the caverns of my weird, screwed-up mind, I just wanna study psychology/psychiatry(yes, psychiatrymaybenow) so I can say I have a mental disorder, get pills, and feel fixed. Actually, that wouldn't even work. If that's what I really think. Which I'm sure I don't... but some part of me... might? Now I'm confusing myself! Maybe I'll just drive myself insane... xPP



Anyway, I'm also either mellowdramatic/sacrificial/right? . I don't know. You know how in the Bible, one of the apostles (I don't remember which... ) speaks about how blessing and cursing come from the tongue. How a stream that produces freshwater cannot produce saltwater, or something similar to that.



I have that. A lot. And it shouldn't be.



It's not just my mouth. It's my mind. I confuse myself sometimes. I try to figure myself out, when a part of me knows the truth, while the others try to think of other things.



I have horrible self-esteem. Some people might not know that.



I hate my body a lot sometimes. I just think I'm ugly sometimes. And it's wrong. God made me. He made everything about me. I should pray more. I should lean on God more. But so many times I get so dang close to falling into that pit of temptation. And it's always within myself. No one else's fault.



No one's ever told me I'm worthless, no one's ever told me I'm fat, or ugly, or stupid, or that I was a bad person. Everyone even says I---
-------------------
Gah. Interrupted. More. So, I started this entry yesterday, and didn't finish it, and I don't feel like it.

But, I did feel like posting it. I'm praying for everyone else right now and their beginning-of-school-issues. My issues are dead today. I feel fine.

Meh. So bipolar I am.



Sooooooooo...

Nothing epical happened for me today at school. I finished my homework during school. The schedule's weird, but that's okay.

Hot N Cold by Katy Perry is addicting. o.e Gawsh, I hated her first single... but she's so contagious! D:< GAH!

Anyway... yeah. *sigh* Love you guys. God Bless. :) Sorry for this confusing entry. I just really wanted to update for you all... even though you probably didn't want to hear me angst on here...

Randomness. Rant. Life. Thoughts. Today. Yeah.

My creativity died in that title...

Anyway, I'd like to let ya'll know, I'ma be pretty much not on very often starting tommorrow, due to being in DC for my cousin's wedding on Tuesday, and after that, on September 2nd, when our plane gets back, I'll be heading to school. o.e Which kinda sucks.

But I'm sure the wedding will be awesomely... ^^

I am really looking forward to this now. I'm gonna see relatives I haven't seen for years, and all that good stuff... and...

*sighs*

Okay, secretly, I really wanna find someone to dance with at the reception. That's one of my eveel boy crazy goals.

xP

Hopefully not related to me. O.O Most likely not... we don't have a lot of guys in the family that aren't about 18 years older than me or anything more than my brother's age. o.e

Anyway... *sigh*

Today I thought about Rose. And Mark. And Jared. I really miss 'em all...

Mark's probably spazzed out because he couldn't make it to the BD party. It wasn't his fault he couldn't make it... *sigh*

I put some more songs on my playlist for Rose... heh. You know, stuff like the stuff we used to sing back in summer of '06, after I discovered MUSIC!, when I talked to her daily for hours upon hours on the phone... good times. *sigh*

Teen Titans fanvids. D': I miss her... *sigh* :'( *cries*

I saw Jared while running errands today. o.e He was with his friend, who has the same name as 'Kim's' brother, David. (Had a crush on him in fifth grade... LOOOONNNGGG story, not to be told right now) Meh. I waved awkwardly, like I was confused/PO'd or something, and then went into the post office and did my post-office duties and all dat.

I was so tempted to just walk over and talk to them...

So that's what I planned, after I went to get my books and return them to the library. And they were gone already, of course. David and Jared have been hangin' out a heck of a lot this summer. *sighs*

I still feel like I screwed things up between Jared and I. Maybe I'm wrong... but I just hope things go well this schoolyear. I still wanna be friends with him. And I'll feel quite hurt if he starts acting like a jerk to me this year.

Ugh. Maybe I SHOULD stay away from guys... but I just can't decide. I think it'd be healthier if I just had a crush on someone... then I'd just watch them, and think about them, and not about M-Word and every hawt guy I ever see... xP I've become too vain, I think. *sigh* I don't care about how a person looks if I date them. But I now know what the world thinks makes someone attractive...

But I guess I still don't care. I have my own preferences. Heh... *sigh*

I'm sighing a lot. o.e

xP I think I'm at the very beginning of falling in... like I'm walking toward the edge that makes you swept in the world, but being pulled back and forth from right and wrong, and I KNOW what's right, and wrong, yet I contemplate them. But I always stop myself before I get in.

Even though my humor has become increasingly crude. And I'm contemplating tolerance on certain issues that I know are wrong. I love God. And I need to focus. I can't go through life without God. That would kill. I wouldn't BE here if I didn't have faith in Him. I wouldn't be ALIVE if he wasn't there. Nor would anyone else...

xP

The most frustrating, depressing, GAH! D:< (ish a face) boards ever:

http://forums.avatarspirit.net/index.php?board=2.0


xPPPP (xP= also a face)

Granted, I learned a lot about certain events from those threads, but still. D:< GAH.

xP

Please don't shoot me for being immature about this right now... *sigh*
*changessubject*


I AM SO EXCITED FOR DC NOW!

I really wanna see my cousins and everyone. Though it'll be awkward to have more of those cheek-pinching aunts you really don't know who go all "Oh my gosh, I haven't seen you since you were a baby!" when they see me... o.e But everything will be good. ^^

:)

Well, school's comin' up... Good luck to all. God Bless. :) ^^

~Aly-chan, "Kim"

I've been tagged. (By Dibsy-chan.)

1. List five things that you like about yourself, or crazy things that you do or other random stuff about you that you feel like putting.-there will be no one accusing someone of bragging!!
2. Tag five other people, and leave a comment on their blog/page.

Well... here goes...

1. I skimmed over the first couple chapters of this book called 'Audrey Wait' by Robin Benway, and I now really wish that people would start flippin' recording the song in the book! Because it sounds like a good song... heh... heheh. I'm listening to the only YouTube recording I could find... (without searching too hard...)

2. I bought fake glasses. Just... cuz. Cuz I'm cool like that. 8) xDDDD Heh... heheh. I also bought a hairclip-like-item, with all this wavy-ish hair that hits mid-back when I clip it to my ponytail when Leanne had to get one for the Breaking Dawn release party this Friday at our local Barnes and Noble. 8)

3. My eyes rock. They're brown and have long eyelashes and are nicely shaped... yeah... random... I also have a ten year old brother who's addicted to Runescape!

4. I swear, one day, I'm going to put some form of unnatural red streaks into my hair. Because I just think it would look cool... just for the heck of it...

5. I used to write fanfictions during classes in sixth grade, by keeping the notebook in my lap, and writing underneath my desk. Most of the time I didn't get caught... though my social studies teacher did once... and my reading teacher lectured me on it... "I'm glad you're writing, but this isn't the time..." blah blah blah... yeah. I honestly did appreciate her... but I was freaked out when my SS teacher tossed my notebook on my desk. I then began writing down ideas to get out of being sent to the principals' office, if I got in that much trouble... (I exaggerate a lot... one of the ideas was 'fake a seizure'... o.e)

So yeah! There are my random things. Which are pretty strange.

I tag:

1. Leanne
2. Ella
3. Nathaniel
4. bright sponge
5. Sienna

Rambling rant rants about stuffs

New characters-

The Church Group Kids- These are the people who I go to youth group and Sunday School with. The only person I ever got SUPER close to there, was Rose, and I got somewhat close to Mark, I suppose. I know a lot about everyone there, and they're my friends. They are close to me, and I pray for them, and I care for them. They're really awesome, and come from different schools in the nearby city, and they're all pretty close to each other too. The group spans (in the summer, when youth group is out) from kids out of sixth grade, and going into ninth grade. In the schoolyear, the grades for middle school ministries spans from sixth through eighth grade.

Bella and Edward- (I gave them these codenames, because they have names relevant to the Twilight series, though they definitely aren't these names, though they might as well be...) A couple whom has been going out for 14 months, and are going into ninth grade.

Bella- A girl going into ninth grade who goes to the church, and is an amazing person, whom takes her boyfriend everywhere. (and her father follows them as well...) She's close to her father, and her caring boyfriend. She once had an obssessive crush on him, writing hers and his name in a youth retreat devotional booklet in hearts as her 'notes'. She likes writing, and is close to her friends, can have a bit of an attitude, and is really an individual person.

Edward- A boy who plays guitar, has awesome hair, and is (unfortunatelyforthosewhosecretlyfangirlspazzoverhim) boyfriend to Bella. He is extremely dedicated to her. He may be silent at times, but once he opens up, one realizes that he is a great guy, funny, and obviously dedicated to Bella.

Macy (remind me if I've used this name already... ^^")- She plays bass, she's 17, and she was homeschooled up until 10th grade. She goes to a Christian school now, and wishes she could cut her uniform skirt... She's very youthful and innocent in some ways, and in other ways, she is an intense, dark, intriguing artist. She writes amazing stories and lyrics, and draws incredible pictures, and has a wild imagination, due to being raised off of drama/sci-fi's, and Star Wars, and likes most sci-fi things. She is an incredible person that I admire and sympathize toward, during her family life at times.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm no longer addicted to soft rock. However, there is no lacking of fluffy love songs, however, I do still love my soft rock. And old Coldplay. And Anna Nalick, and Ingrid Michaelson, and all them peoplez.

Anyway, my newer-ish music interests, or revivals... or just further interests... are stemmed from mix CDs of Christian Rock/Metal that this dude from my church, Ed (who is absolutely hothothothothohtohot), made for us to ride on the rides to and from wherever we went in our big vans during travel, like the eight hour trip from MN to SD. The music was great. And I had a ton of stuff I wanted to look up after I'd heard both (or however many... ) of the CDs there were.

I suddenly fell in love with some of the Skillet songs I'd heard over and over from one of my other friends, Macy, made me listen to. And Flyleaf. And learned about some other awesomesauce Christian rock-ish bands, like FM Static... and hearing all the guys in the back singing 'Love Addict' by Family Force 5 was hilarious and rockin'sauce. Though it annoyed most of the other guys.

So, I like rock-i-er-ish-item-music-thing right now. But still a lot of Alt. Rock. But more things like Flyleaf, and Paramore, music like that. And new modern-y-ish stuff too... but I've almost completely rid my music of hip-hop/rap. And I skip most of my Linkin Park songs right now too. O: Which is kinda sad. But they're negative and all that... I use most of that music for my characters and other people who listen to it all the time. Kris has been obssessing over the YouTube playlist I made for the roleplay we're both in, and she finally finished listening to it today, or at least I think she did. It has 86 songs on it, I believe. But, of course, YT deleted some of the vids, like YT does, so I've gotta go edit at some point... (xP toopid procrastination/laziness disorder.)

*sigh* I'm listening to Tonight by FM Static. It is sad. Especially with the movie it's using in the vid. (A Walk To Remember... I really need to watch that... we have all these movies that we own, yet I don't ever watch them... so I gotta do that with this one... )

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bg45rOnbnCA

^teh vid

I love that song. It is so sad... I had an idea of what it meant... the guy falls in love with a girl, and she witnesses to him, and they're in love, and she dies, and it's sad... :'(

But I love it... *sniff* :'(

Well, at least that's how the movie seems right now...

Anyvayz, I just thought I'd leave a random blog. God Bless you all! :) <3333

~Aly-chan

My Uneventful Day... (and yesterday's doll adventures... o.O)

I talked on the phone.

I stayed on the computer.

I used
http://pbskids.org/cyberchase/games/patterns/ ,

http://www.millsberry.com/studio/ ,
and
http://www.cartoonnetwork.com/games/classof3000/funkbox/index.html
to make an instrumental song. (Which, didn't sound half-bad, in all honesty.)

I also put OneRepublic's 'Dreaming Out Loud', Hoku's 'Hoku', and Superchick's 'Regeneration, Last One Picked, and 'Beauty From Pain' onto my Windows Media Player, because I'm just that technologically unadvanced. *yawn* I did make a few more playlists on there, cuz I'm just addicted to playlists like that...

I've been writing this little side-story fanfic thing about the roleplay, "In Their Eyes" from AvatarSpirit.Net, because I write in that, and I'm just obssessed with ITE like that... (Leanne and Nathaniel and maybe even Ella might know about some of that...)

And then I called Ella and 'Leanne' (whom is Kris in the coded blog)... and they were picking out makeup for the Breaking Dawn prom at Barnes and Noble in August, cuz I got Leanne in a dress yesterday to see what she would look like as our Rosalie. (It was either she was Rosalie, and we were 'sisters', or else she'd be Jasper, and 'Alyce' would be very strange and abnormal... ) So yeah. Kris is very tomboy-y, but she's also a girl.

Yesterday, Kris and I hung out at my house. We played with My Scene dolls. They were being 'muffinly'. And Barbie was a suggestive, dumb-blonde, who somehow dressed like a hippy. o.e Anyyyywayyy... we had a ghost-girl 'emo' who was like, basically a suicidal Mary Sue (see 'fanfiction author language') and had problems, and yet, this one girl's African-British boyfriend started feeling attracted toward her after rescuing her from jumping off the top of my dresser drawers. I-I... I mean, tall building... and the one actual 'cultural' Barbie doll was being like Barbie and wasn't paying attention to his odd attraction. Until Sue started being weird. And he followed her. And THEN she freaked out. And Insertname Here, the Madison doll (cuz I'm just weird like that and actually DO know every single name of all the most recent MyScene doll names... ) whose head pops off, learned that popping her head off to random people, laughing insanely and walking around with your head off and still living, then putting your head back on, is creepy and scares people. Sue dressed up in a creepy white dress with a black scarf and no shoes, revealing that My Scene dolls, do, in fact, have tiny feet that magically enlarge while wearing shoes. While River slept in his apartment, in a shelf, with a comfortable bed made up of humongous skirts and leggings, Barbie, who lived in the apartment above him, the one with all the dress shirts and random other stuffs, was hanging out with Sutton's girlfriend, Insertname Here, and Sutton, who then followed Sue...

Yup. That's the epical episode of: "My Scene Dolls: The WTF(oople)!? Episode!"

Yeah.

The one week where I'm supposed to be the MOST focused on the Mission Trip, I'm not. Lord, forgive me. I need that... I need to start focusing, and stop procrastinating my packing and my devotionals and even my time spent with God. Lord forgive me... God Bless you all.

*sings loudly* SCHOOL'S... OUT... FOR.. SUMMAH! SCHOOL'S OUT FOR. EVAH!!! XD

Yup.

School just got out today. That song is in reference (I have no knowledge of 'classic rock', sorry... well, at least not as much knowledge as I possibly could...) to the Guitar Hero game we got to play in 'math class' today. We just had pretty much an entire day of PARTY at school today... it was pretty rockin'sauce.

Kim is now re-going out with Jared. (Grrr... reminds me of Jared from 'The Host'... WHY STEPHENIE, WHYYYYYYY?!) Anyway, they're together. XP Again. It's no problem... just that... yah... She may just have to take 'Jared' off of her list for receiving blog notification....

Anyway, The Host is a flippin' awesome book. 8)

But, of course, I am needing moralistic guidance. T.T Well, talk to ya'll later! *randomness'd*

Sorry it's been a while since I updated... IF I HAVE ANY READERS... xP

Kim is PMSing! YEY! XP

Mood swiiiiiiings.

8)

Anyway, I'm updating randomly. I have a dance this Friday. I have no guys willing to dance with me! WHEEEEE! I do have my friends though... <333 They rox. XD

I'm mood swingyyyyy.

Anyway, internet addiction is in full-blow, as I addictively post on my addictive roleplay with my friend...

I continue reading my Bible everyday, however. I've been reading a Proverb a day. I also read Song of Songs.

Well, random update hooray. ILY U PPL.

Now on a lighter note...Ella's blog, and more char.s!

MUFFINS.

2 things.

My dearest friend, miss Ella-chan... now has a blog.
http://mymindisagraveyard-deadthingsareinit.blogspot.com/


http://katara5.blogspot.com/
^Internet friend, Lizzie/Elle

One other thing:

More characters! <3

Tasha- Kim's close friend who lives on the east coast and one she's never met physically... well you know, the internet's a pretty amazering place. She's moved around a lot, she's Kim's RPing partner online on the roleplay they're obsessed with writing. She's an awesome writer, and an awesome artist, and loves anime/manga.

Brooke- Kim's friend since 3rd grade. Goes to her school, and is in three of her core classes in the morning now. She has a boyfriend currently, his name being Darren.

Kyley, Bella, Alana, Merri, Terra, Mindy, Corrie- A group of girls that Kim had wanted to hang out with for years, and finally accomplishes in her seventh grade year. They've always had similar interests and she's always longed to hang out with these people for their personalities and overall funtasticalness. Kim enjoys hanging out and talking to them all.

Allen- Kyley's boyfriend. Most of her friends don't know why she goes out with him, but they've been together a pretty long time for their age... and for a lot of other people's ages.

Arisa (Let's call her... Reese.)- Another one of Kim's awesome new friends from Rose's school. She rox sox. She's rather tomboyish on the outside, and is close friends with Ella, Kris, and Jones. ( she es Miss Awesomeness on Ella's blog)

Jones- Jones is the one other dude from Rose, Kris, Mark, Ella, and Reese's school that Kim recently made acquaintance to at a certain Target Starbucks on a certain Friday while drinking some certain Frappichinos and loudly socializing with a wide variety of somewhat innappropriate inside jokes... He is funny, loves bands like Cake, and Weezer, and has a surprising knowledge of he politcal candidates in the '08 run. (J.R. on Ella's blog)

David- Kim's younger brother. He's 10 and "knows" too much for his age... hmm, I wonder who's fault that is... ^^'

And that's about it for today in characters.

UGGHHHHH. None of my RP friends are on and I es booooooooooooooored. *headdesk* Well, <3 all you people!

Don't forget God loves you no matter what happens in your life! THERE IS A LIGHT AT THE END OF ALL TUNNELS.

Hello peoplez... Intoduction to ME

Ai'ight, Ai'ight... Okay. First off, the references of my URL name, for you people who don't get the DORKY kind of pop culture references... and the... well the 'Get that girl a mood ring' thing...

Mood Ring= A song by Relient K about how guys should get girls mood rings so they can tell what their mood is. Heh... I <3>

URL Name: Reference to a book I recently read for a book club in school, the third book in the Series of Unfortunate Events:The Wide Window. Miss Sunny Baudelaire is young, and comes with her own wonderfully brilliant language...heh. Anyway, she says this awesome word, 'Delmo', which means "If you wish, I will bite the telephone to prove to you it's harmless." *seriously,readthebook...* So yah.


And if this introduction hasn't already weirded you out enough, then please feel free to stop reading. And if you've gotten this far anyway... KEEP GOING! xD *good thing you caught me in one of my sugar high moodz*

I am Aly K. I erm... yah. I am rather short, I feel overweight, but all of my friends constantly tell me 'You're thin' and all that good crap... and a couple guys, but... yeah, long story, anywayyyy... yah. I'm too addicted to the internet to get off my butt and do other stuff. I stay inside a lot, but I tan easily... at least I hope I still do. I'm Filipino-American... my mom was born in the Phillipines, my dad had a Mexican mom, and has a German dad, so... yah... 8) Anyway.... I'm short. xP Like, not even five feet tall yet. XP I normally have a lot of energy, but when I don't, I'm really tired and crap and it sucks. xP I need to get out more... Heh. Some random stuff about me: I wanna get kissed in the rain, gosh dangit! COME ON I NEED MY EDWARD! D': I'm an 'aspiring author' and am currently afflicted by severe writer's block, which is partially why I'm writing this blog... I'm also an aspiring 'shrink', but seriously. I wanna be a counseling psychologist and I wanna help... particularly younger people, teenagers, maybe younger people, adults of course, but... yeah. I wanna be there for people. Okay, enough deepnesss...

My interests- I love listening to music, I'm a pretty decent singer I would believe, I love writing, drawing (in the anime style, of course), reading manga, watching anime. Here's for my favorite part of internet profiles...

MUSIC
Bands/Solo Artists- Switchfoot, Relient K, Paramore, My Chemical Romance, Flyleaf, Linkin Park, Good Charlotte, Skillet, Coldplay, The Fray, OneRepublic, Ingrid Michaelson, Avril Lavigne, Anna Nalick
All the Books I've Read in the Past Year and This Year that I remember well enough and liked enough to put on this list
Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse by Stephenie Meyer <33333, face="Times New Roman">
And my reading teacher says I don't read a variety of books.

Other random stuffs: I'm obsessed with roleplaying, especially with this one RP on ASN my online friend and I have been carrying on for a while.... :3 XD I'm hardly a computer or net wiz, but I love writing online and talking and the communication and everything... but yah. I'd love to know how to do advanced HTML and turn MS Paint as a sophisticated art tool! :o

Most Important Part of this Introduction Blog Thing
The most important part of my life is God. The Creator of the Earth. Jesus Christ who died for our sins. Yes, I am a Christian. I believe that all humans are sinners and that if you accept Christ into your heart, and love him, and strive to follow his word, you will someday be with him.

<3 face="Times New Roman">
Me everywhere else on the Net:

ConfusedShipper123 on AvatarSpirit.Net (everyday baby, everday...)
ConfusedShipper123 on YouTube (I have one video. DO NOT STALK ME!)
xoRed_Ruffled_Tulipxo on CartoonDollEmporium (I'm hardly ever there, but... yah... )
Queen_of_SHIPPING25 on FanFiction.Net (Believe me, I'll post something eventually!)
ZutaraGirl234567 on DeviantART.com (I actually have stuffs there... <333)

(Note: I'm actually more BxJ now, but... <3 face="Times New Roman">Other emails- edwardxbella910@hotmail.com